Where, oh, where have all the metaphors gone?

Mary pointed out to me the other day that I must not be fond of metaphors. This got me to thinking.

I think it was all that Joyce on an impressionable mind that did it. Someone says alabaster ears and I think of cities on the side of a head.

I also think that i hid behind the idea that metaphors limit meaning more than they expand it. But then, so do all adjectives...kinda.

Maybe I just don't know what a metaphor is.

Its just that speaking without metaphors is a landscape of one-armed windmills, a day without Vitamin C, a thick salivating accent without language, a pipe organ with kidney stones, a marathon in moon boots, an oatmeal pie. Mmmmmmmm...oatmeal pie.

Pressure

sinus pressure my head is full of hardening concrete my eyes leak escaping air my jaw is fused to my inner ear post nasal drip making me sneeze postal


"why can't he just go with you two?"
"well, don't you think that'd be awkward?"
"i dunno, that's the way i would do it."
"well, if it wasn't for the way you do things he wouldn't need a ride would he?"
"yeah, but you wouldn't be going either."
"that's beside the point."
"you're beside the point."
"i know, that's the problem..."

Just think how much my soul is worth...

I am worth $2,099,732.00 on HumanForSale.com

Seriously

It's really hard for me to take anything very seriously at all. Even the things that I make fun of the most. I never rewrite anything for this reason and maybe some others. I can't tell if I'm afraid of seriousness and all that it inflicts or if well what is much more likely, I'm just lazy. Which I am just lazy, but so are you for making that stand against the plagarization of shopping carts. So are you for rearending that chicken that won't go against the grain. So am I for now, and then. Maybe I just like the sun or the reflection of a mirror or the ear print on a soapstone. A sunfish is never too good to eat. It can nocturnall around into this, but we'll give it a try anyway.